Verbal diarrohea(sp?). Get ready for it.

So for anyone who doesn't know yet i have picked up a job at zouk. And i have also been working OT for the past 2 weeks. In that time i have clocked a grand total of 141 hours of work. Which should bring me a big fat cash hongbao of 900+. Haven't deducted cpf yet. god i hate cpf. I mean its completely useless for a person who wants to commit suicide before hes 60. Its discriminating against me! More on zouk later.

I'm doing this purely for the money. Now i know what your thinking...money does not gurantee you happiness. I think thats a load of hogwash designed by the bourgeoisie elites to keep the proletariat happy. I haven't met one single rich guy who wasn't well adjusted. If you have money...you certainly, absolutely have one less thing to worry about. No? Kinda understand how girls go straight for the rich expats/old men. Seems so fucking easy than dealing with all this shit. Hell just fake a few orgasms till the fucker croaks..or better still nail him with the pre-nup.

Simmering tensions in the house erupted again. I think it all started when my mom didn't like my new job. not that i particularly care though. for some reason the shop came up again only thing is there has been a new development. My dad has realised the futility of working in a shop that can't pay its own bills. (ok to be fair theres a bit of house expenses in there). My mother on the other hand is "convinced" that the time is not right to give it up yet. I have been waiting for 4 years.

She seems convinced a miracle will happen. She says god says its not the time yet. Now i always had a healthy respect for god. I'm not a pure atheist. Because i can't prove that god doesn't exist. And those people who think they in their limited capacity of mind know absolutely better....are fools. The only truth is what you believe in. But for what you have done to my mother..pseudo being that you are. I denounce you. Thats like the most cardinal of cardinal sins. I refuse to acknowledge your presence cause you have reduced my mother to a mere pittance...a desperate person who can't form opinions for herself. There goes my salvation.

Now you may think this reaction extreme. think that i'm still far from the cliff. i'm not begging for money on the streets yet. And if you go to my house you will see that i have 2 computers, 2 tvs, 2 fridges. except for the fridges though..none of them have been bought in the last 5 years. The 2 computers, one is from the starhub tie-in from a year ago, the other from the PREV one 3 years ago. The big tv is spoilt. So is the heater. The fridge is chock full of preparatory ingredients. Sometimes you can find milk. Lots of drinks though. Instant stuff like hash browns. Hard pressed to find anything else (like MEAT). I have no idea how to pay for my education other than taking a big fat loan. My parents cpf is depleted(naturally seeing as to how they are self-employed) and theres still 10 years on the mortgage.

The cliff doesn't look too far for me.

Certainly i believe there are so many things that money can buy. Thats why i work as hard as i do. And i can always rest in UNI. Not stupid though..looking to upgrade my day job to something higher paying. People keep saying they want to quit their job even though its much better paying because its stressful. I eat stress for dinner. You will be surprised how much you can take.